Yesterday was an exciting day. There have been a lot of them lately. I believe that these few months of we are almost published made up for the last several years of self-doubt and self-realization. For a while there I was not competing with the worthiness of my book but rather the worthiness of whether I deserve to be known for it. Ridiculous sounding it may be but as an author you are filled with conflictions of whether you have the right to ask for people to notice and then purchase your work of art.
Today I continued to take charge of my life. In my experience of knowing people it is the one trait that majority of people lack. Everyone claims they want a life to be proud of but at the end of the day no one really puts their foot down and says lets get started. Then there are the others that get started but never finish. For me everything has always been, if your not going to finish then why do it at all.
Finally I am selling my paperback out of my car and I am still agonizingly waiting for the ebook to become available later this month. Finally it feels real. Everything I worked for has come to these moments. My family and friends have all been asking the same questions: “You must be so excited to have your book out!” For most I smile and nod but for those who get me, and usually roll there eyes at me, I give the truth with the following response, “It’s about time. I’m just ready for the next step.”
Perhaps I am skipping over the party stage but that is just who I am. When I moved out of my parents years ago the only celebration I did was setting things up then going back to work. When I bought a house I didn’t throw a house party. Instead I started the project of renovation getting to the point that I didn’t want people to see my house under construction or now too much time has passed. I’m not one to stay in the lime light and ask for a celebration. Once a task is finished I see a dozen more task that need my attention and that becomes more important immediately.
Am I excited about the release of my book? Very much, quietly so. I’ve been getting great reactions from people around me and people I have never met before. People online are reaching out to me and it is very humbling. Now I’m really concerned with getting Book 2 of the Project E.D.E.N. series done. There are two things holding me back from that milestone which is getting myself to focus on editing and selling enough of the first book to pay for the second book to get edited by a real editor and all those lovely fees associated with getting your words on paper.
If you like a scifi/fantasy/romance/dystopian movie please check out Project E.D.E.N. I’ve been told that it is the perfect read for fans of twilight, hunger games, lord of the rings, harry potter…… What it has to offer is a diverse family living in our culture but preparing to change the culture of a government facility housing people like them with abilities. I dare you to fall in love with my main character, Cedric, a 17 year old boy whose been cursed with the ability to walk through people’s dreams. Visit http://www.BMauritz.com to find out more or comment.