Restart

For so long we keep running in circles. From morning to night or night to morning we run through routines and meet personal to business deadlines. We become programmed and at times are often machines. Bad habits are formed from fast food and energy drinks to running on fumes. We struggle at times and then once in a while we excel.

The happy days are great, refreshing perhaps. However they are easily dismissed through the long haul of daily inaptitude. The hardest part is when we don’t see it coming. We start to live with idiocies and disdainful moments that peck away at our hardened skin that has developed against the day to day bruising. Like any chip on our shoulder, if the right moment strikes, it breaks us into pieces and we combust.

That bottled up moment of despair is agonizing to oneself and perhaps everyone around them. It isn’t easy but everyday stress needs to be managed and that starts by looking at what you can control. Let’s see….you can’t control the weather, other people’s actions, the problems in this world….wait I had something I can control but I forgot it…..

Oh, yea, that’s yourself. The one thing in this world that you have control over is the way you think of things, the way you choose to treat others, and ultimately your actions. Once the days events lead me to home, the one place I can be myself unprofessional and not care about anyone but me (I haven’t had the privilege of deciding to be a parent yet), I start to feel the weight of everything and I choose to dissect. So I decide to go into restart which means I need to review my running programs, organize them, and get rid of the junk.

During this process I think about the days events that are like a highlight reel. What went well, what didn’t. Unfortunately I focus more on the negative. Then I get mad at myself for what I did have control of but didn’t use…my voice, my reasoning, my reaction…. Regardless of the events, and the realization of what you could have controlled but didn’t, you must reconcile and bring your thoughts and conclusions to an end. Reconciling with my thoughts, learning from my mistakes, remembering my wins, I resolve to do better tomorrow. To take what I am good at and shine again, to remember what I want to change and amend my future.

Restart. It’s a choice. Will yourself to be better because you deserve better things and they will come if you give it your all.

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